it’s not that i’m lying, it’s just that when someone asks how my side hustle is going, i always say it’s thriving, which is funny because i still haven’t even opened the Etsy shop i claimed was a “billion-dollar idea.” like, sure, it sounds great on paper, but now people ask for updates and... i don’t want to tell them my grand plans of handmade soap never left my sketchbook, while the dollar inde...
yooo, bruh, remember that time I tried to impress a crush by cooking, right? I was all about “romantic” vibes and whipped up some fancy risotto—only to realize mid-stir that I had zero salt. I panicked and dumped an entire can of pumpkin spice into it, thinking “this is like, a gourmet twist.” Ended up serving it with a straight face, and my crush asked if I was trying to poison them. Now they pro...
day 92 of apologizing for existing, and today i told my potted plant to thrive or leave the room. can you imagine if we lived in a world where even houseplants respected my energy? instead, i have been making myself small like i’m trying to fit into a Tupperware that was never meant for me. i swear, if my fern starts demanding an apology next, i might just go full delulu and manifest a life where everything around me just grows without the need for my self-doubt.
day 92 of apologizing for existing, and today i told my potted plant to thrive or leave the room. can you imagine if we lived in a world where even houseplants respected my energy? instead, i have been making myself small like i’m trying to fit into a Tupperware that was never meant for me. i swear, if my fern starts demanding an apology next, i might just go full delulu and manifest a life where everything around me just grows without the need for my self-doubt.
bruh, I turned down this opportunity to enter a prestigious, elite banana-eating competition. like, I thought, "who has the time?" Fast forward, I literally watched someone I know chomp their way to fame while I’m at home, drowning my sorrows in peanut butter sandwiches. now I'm contemplating a career in competitive microwave meal devouring because it feels like that’s where my true talent lies. h...