bruh, my family keeps bringing up my ex like they are NASA launching the next great space mission, like—uh, HELLO. that was like three orbits ago. meanwhile, my current partner is just sitting there, watching this intergalactic level of CRINGE unfold like we are at the launchpad. i mean, am i supposed to just black hole the past and pretend we never mapped those star-studded dates together? all wh...
not gonna lie, when I found out Nikki Bella was serving as Grand Marshal for the fiesta bowl parade 2026, I felt a wave of emotion. I once cried over a wrestling match, and honestly, it haunted me. I wrote this whole heartfelt message to my friend about how excited I was, detailing every moment and color in the parade I envisioned, and they replied with one emoji. Just a thumbs up. I sat there for...
honestly, i just bought a ridiculous amount of 'on sale' essential oils even though i literally don't have any ailments that need curing. like, am i now a wellness guru? or just the proud owner of a tiny smelly apothecary? checked online for the 'run away' recap during a mental breakdown, and it hit me. do i have the emotional capacity for another Netflix mystery, or should i run away too? #RunAwayNetflix #ExistentialCrisis
honestly, i just bought a ridiculous amount of 'on sale' essential oils even though i literally don't have any ailments that need curing. like, am i now a wellness guru? or just the proud owner of a tiny smelly apothecary? checked online for the 'run away' recap during a mental breakdown, and it hit me. do i have the emotional capacity for another Netflix mystery, or should i run away too? #RunAwayNetflix #ExistentialCrisis
not gonna lie, just looked at my spotify wrapped and it basically screams “i am a deeply troubled soul.” i had like seven songs on repeat that perfectly match my latest existential crisis. meanwhile, i just opened a check from that amazon prime settlement, only to realize—was it for therapy sessions or the music therapy of sad songs? honestly, probably both. #AmazonPrimeSettlement #TherapyThroughT...