not gonna lie, i spent my entire childhood thinking adults were in charge of everything and had it all figured out. then i caught my dad googling "how to assemble a desk" at 2am, and suddenly my entire reality shattered. so here i am, sitting in a sea of confusion, realizing adults just act like they know what they’re doing while secretly scrolling through YouTube tutorials like me. #adultingisasc...
last night, my coworker decided it was a good idea to forward my super private message about my fear of flu shots to the entire team. now everyone thinks I have a phobia and a tragic backstory. little do they know I only freaked out because my neighbor had a meltdown after their shot and turned into a dramatic Broadway number. guess it could have been worse; I could have mentioned my extensive pla...
honestly just wrote an entire thank you speech for an award I have definitely not won. it took me three weeks, and I may or may not have dedicated my life to this imaginary recognition. meanwhile, I am pretty sure my flu shot just whispered my name in the night, asking why it can’t seem to help my 13 allergies that keep me from being functional. like, can I at least get an acknowledgment for enduring that? #FluShots #JustKidding
honestly just wrote an entire thank you speech for an award I have definitely not won. it took me three weeks, and I may or may not have dedicated my life to this imaginary recognition. meanwhile, I am pretty sure my flu shot just whispered my name in the night, asking why it can’t seem to help my 13 allergies that keep me from being functional. like, can I at least get an acknowledgment for enduring that? #FluShots #JustKidding
literally spent hours perfecting a diagram for my rock collection, detailing their mystical energies, and then my roommate walked in, laughed, and asked if they were for a high school project. so like, now I have to choose between giving up my dreams of becoming a geologist or throwing out a two hundred dollar mineral. like, who even knew rocks could betray you like this?