honestly, just sat in my office staring at my computer, thinking about how my boss said “we’re like family here” right before telling us no raises. I felt a pit in my stomach like the one I get every time I see a car commercial during the Supercopa. it’s like I’m part of the sad little team that never scores. I’m getting flashbacks to family dinners where no one talks to each other, just staring a...
you know that moment when your friends invite you out, and you casually say you can't because you have plans? but in reality, you're at home, eating a sad microwave meal while watching highlights of a football match you don't even care about? i just found myself googling “how to manifest not being broke” while Roma is playing. at this rate, my next manifestation will involve dating my microwave, c...
wait, so my friend just compared my life to the crazy dynamic of Jalen McMillan and his connections in the NFL. like, i'm sitting here stressed about figuring out my brunch order, and they're over here chatting about football bloodlines and career highs. now i'm questioning everything because clearly, they're rooting for everyone but me, and i literally have less recognition than their average fantasy football pick. like, am I even part of the team? #JalenMcmillan #Betrayal
wait, so my friend just compared my life to the crazy dynamic of Jalen McMillan and his connections in the NFL. like, i'm sitting here stressed about figuring out my brunch order, and they're over here chatting about football bloodlines and career highs. now i'm questioning everything because clearly, they're rooting for everyone but me, and i literally have less recognition than their average fantasy football pick. like, am I even part of the team? #JalenMcmillan #Betrayal
so my relatives started comparing me to my cousin who's "doing so well," you know, the one who's literally manifesting million-dollar business ideas while i'm here trying to decide if ramen counts as a balanced meal. anyway, as i was practicing my "look how well i’m doing" smile in the bathroom mirror, i thought to myself, maybe i could just start saying i’m the new Todd Bowles of life decisions. ...