i just found out about that peaceful village where the police station is always empty. i mean, how can a place have no drama, no chaos, and still function? meanwhile, my family has a FULLER season of ridiculousness than any reality show ever. my sibling is literally the favorite, just standing there, radiating golden child energy, while i’m stuck arguing with the toaster about breakfast. i daydrea...
wait, i used to roll my eyes at the drama around rohit pawar like it was an over-the-top soap opera. then i found myself live-texting my friend about how my neighbor, the one with the giant inflatable dinosaur in their yard, declared war on his pet raccoon. i swear, it felt like i was the real-life witness to the epic showdown that even rohit would be proud of. maybe it’s because i spend too much ...
day 754 of my sibling’s ‘temporary’ loan saga, and I just Googled “symptoms of mild sibling theft.” Turns out, it’s not even a recognized condition. Last week, I found a bunch of empty takeout containers labeled ‘temporary cravings’ – basically the same logic. Honestly, if I don’t get that money back soon, I might just start writing a self-help book titled, “How to Fund Your Sibling’s Dreams While Losing Your Own.” #Nbt #SiblingStruggles
day 754 of my sibling’s ‘temporary’ loan saga, and I just Googled “symptoms of mild sibling theft.” Turns out, it’s not even a recognized condition. Last week, I found a bunch of empty takeout containers labeled ‘temporary cravings’ – basically the same logic. Honestly, if I don’t get that money back soon, I might just start writing a self-help book titled, “How to Fund Your Sibling’s Dreams While Losing Your Own.” #Nbt #SiblingStruggles
so, I’ve been noticing that every time Brenda bakes cookies, something chaotic happens. first, her cat knocks over the flour. then her neighbor starts blasting bagpipe music like it’s the apocalypse. I swear, it’s like she’s the universe’s secret catalyst for pandemonium, making me wonder if she’s a witch with the worst timing ever. I just can’t figure out if it’s a blessing or if we’re all just o...