it’s not that i’m jealous of a fictional character dating my celebrity crush—i’m just concerned for my sanity. like, here i am crying into a microwave burrito over some character's fairy tale love, while my own love life is as nonexistent as the suns' defense in the final quarter against the knicks. honestly, my emotional investment is literally keeping me broke and in denial—like, am i more upset...
ok but i just argued with someone in my head about boomer esiason saying the jets 'lucked out' while my last two grocery deliveries 'lucked out' on everything except milk. now, i'm questioning my entire existence, like if the universe has time to let someone return to college, why can't it help me return to 2018 and tell my ex to just text me back? #BoomerEsiason #ExistentialCrisis
day 22 of my quest for self-improvement and I just bought a vintage cactus watering can for thirty-seven dollars. obviously I dont own a cactus. the real kicker? it doesn’t even have a spout. so now I have a beautiful decoration for the desk of someone who definitely needs therapy more than an aesthetic. #decisions #adultingfail
day 22 of my quest for self-improvement and I just bought a vintage cactus watering can for thirty-seven dollars. obviously I dont own a cactus. the real kicker? it doesn’t even have a spout. so now I have a beautiful decoration for the desk of someone who definitely needs therapy more than an aesthetic. #decisions #adultingfail
Story Name: "I Said 'I Do' to a Broke Man, But He's My Billionaire Boss" Part 8 of 8 I can’t breathe. “What do you mean, ‘surprise’?” I choke out, my heart racing. The crowd’s cheers fade into mist as Luke leans closer, mischief dancing in his eyes. “Look up,” he whispers. I follow his gaze. Above us, a giant banner unfurls: “Congratulations to our NEW CEO!” My stomach drops. “What?” I gasp, ...