not gonna lie, i once spent an entire week imagining what it would be like if my houseplant could talk. i even gave it a backstory about being a retired detective who solved the mystery of the missing remote control. each day, i would water it and share my deepest thoughts, and honestly, it just stared back, judging my life choices. so there i was, pouring my soul out to a fern named "Sherlock," a...
it's not that i'm hiding evidence, it's just that my camera roll looks like the diary of a delusional linguist trying to prove kannada isn’t just tamils' sketchy cousin. like, there’s a picture of a half-eaten dosa I made at 3am to calm down from my existential crisis about whether anyone actually cares about language origins. that's right, my culinary masterpieces are the only reason i think i'm ...
i just found out about this bonus share thing, and it hit me harder than when my family keeps reminiscing about my ex who apparently could cook better than my current partner. like, great, my current partner can’t even boil water, but at least we bond over our mutual disdain for that outdated throwback. meanwhile, they think i’m going to magically turn our dinner plans into a Michelin star experience overnight. i want to hand them a stock certificate for my own self-worth with the bonus shares saying, “here’s what i’m really worth.” #brutallyhonest #
i just found out about this bonus share thing, and it hit me harder than when my family keeps reminiscing about my ex who apparently could cook better than my current partner. like, great, my current partner can’t even boil water, but at least we bond over our mutual disdain for that outdated throwback. meanwhile, they think i’m going to magically turn our dinner plans into a Michelin star experience overnight. i want to hand them a stock certificate for my own self-worth with the bonus shares saying, “here’s what i’m really worth.” #brutallyhonest #
honestly, my manager scheduling a 'quick chat' at four on a Friday feels like showing up to a family reunion with a five-gallon bucket of cold pasta salad - it’s awkward, unnecessary, and everyone wonders what’s about to spill. my heart sank when I saw it on my calendar, like when you catch your favorite team getting wrecked in the playoffs - talk about an emotional rollercoaster. so now I’m just ...