not gonna lie, I once literally got caught red-handed in a public bathroom attempting to create a human sculpture out of hand soap. like, I was totally focused, convinced I could make something majestic, when suddenly this stranger walks in, and I just froze, hands covered in foamy disaster. their look was so priceless I kinda wished I had my phone to capture it—like, here I am in a quest for arti...
yooo, so I was in this pottery class, right? and the instructor goes, “you really need to feel the clay, embrace it.” so there I am, palms sweaty, acting like I’m in a therapy session. bruh, when they asked how it felt to create, I panicked and said, “thank you?” like I just got a free sample at a farmer’s market. now I’m the person who claps at movies just for showing up, and I can't even...
wait. my boss introduced me to the new intern as 'just a friend' during the office icebreaker. like, who brings their friend's emotional support animal to a workplace party? so there I was, dodging questions about my “cat” while the poor intern looked confused. great. now I’m labeled as the crazy cat person with NO cat. thanks, Karen.
wait. my boss introduced me to the new intern as 'just a friend' during the office icebreaker. like, who brings their friend's emotional support animal to a workplace party? so there I was, dodging questions about my “cat” while the poor intern looked confused. great. now I’m labeled as the crazy cat person with NO cat. thanks, Karen.
no because the other day I realized I’ve been giving people the 'Obama' version of myself—smooth, charming, ready for a political debate, while really I’m just over here in pajamas, talking to my houseplants—like they’re my entire cabinet. it’s exhausting to play this role when all I really want is to let my inner chaotic gremlin shine—like, why does nobody know I silently judge my own cooking whi...