wait, so I decided to literally take up amateur birdwatching, right? I went to the park with binoculars and a notepad to take notes on their habits. now I’m like a full-on avian anthropologist in my head, plotting my research paper titled “The Secret Lives of Sparrows” while barely being able to identify a pigeon. now I have to explain to my friends why I will be spending all my weekends staring i...
it’s day 47 of ignoring my dreams while sipping instant coffee. found out today that my old college buddy just struck gold with an opportunity I casually turned down. they’ve gone from basement dweller to literal mogul while I’m still negotiating the price of gold at the market. honestly, if gold rates keep going up, I might need to take up metal detecting just to afford a future. #
i just spent thirty minutes scrolling through the comments section of a random TikTok video of two strangers arguing about avocados. like, seriously, these people were dissecting each other’s entire life choices based on whether or not guacamole is a salad. now i'm emotionally invested, planning my intervention, picturing myself sliding into their DMs with avocado-related puns, but then— a new comment drops. the one guy's about to reveal his secret recipe for a wedding proposal... in an avocado. i mean, WHAT happens next?
i just spent thirty minutes scrolling through the comments section of a random TikTok video of two strangers arguing about avocados. like, seriously, these people were dissecting each other’s entire life choices based on whether or not guacamole is a salad. now i'm emotionally invested, planning my intervention, picturing myself sliding into their DMs with avocado-related puns, but then— a new comment drops. the one guy's about to reveal his secret recipe for a wedding proposal... in an avocado. i mean, WHAT happens next?
last night, I accidentally sent my detailed analysis of the new ‘Dhurandhar’ movie to my work group chat instead of my best friend. my coworkers now know my emotional attachment to Ranveer Singh's hairline. if only they knew i cried over his impeccable dramatic monologue while arguing with my plants about life decisions. #DhurandharOtt #sendhelp