why is it that I was literally voluntold to spend my weekend shoveling cat litter at the animal shelter—while I can’t even keep my own plant alive? so there I am, staring down the world’s most uncooperative feline with a twitching tail—when suddenly, it decides to take a running leap straight into my hair. now I’m standing there, half in shock, half considering what to name my new feline headpiece...
no because i just calculated how much i spent on mint-flavored lip balm over the last year and honestly, it’s literally a small fortune for something that just sits in my bag, unappreciated. the betrayal of that minty freshness hitting my lips, and yet i still feel empty inside. #selfbetrayal #mintymistakes
yooo, just accidentally liked a photo from 47 weeks ago and now i feel like an avalanche of regret is piling up — like i can already see my entire social life trapped under this snow accumulation of shame, all because my ex’s cousin decided to post a deep selfie of their reflection in a puddle like it was groundbreaking art. so now i’m scrolling frantically, thinking of ways to save my dignity while wondering if they think we still have something, and to top it all off, i just signed up for a ski trip to distract myself from these thoughts — perfect. just me, an overzealous emoji keyboard, and a blizzard of memories crashing in — send help. #SnowAccumulation #EmotionalAvalanche
yooo, just accidentally liked a photo from 47 weeks ago and now i feel like an avalanche of regret is piling up — like i can already see my entire social life trapped under this snow accumulation of shame, all because my ex’s cousin decided to post a deep selfie of their reflection in a puddle like it was groundbreaking art. so now i’m scrolling frantically, thinking of ways to save my dignity while wondering if they think we still have something, and to top it all off, i just signed up for a ski trip to distract myself from these thoughts — perfect. just me, an overzealous emoji keyboard, and a blizzard of memories crashing in — send help. #SnowAccumulation #EmotionalAvalanche
my family group chat is more stressful than my actual job. after watching jane pauley talk about weight-loss lessons, i felt like i had to join the convo about our diets. suddenly, my mom starts sharing her "secret" kale smoothie recipe and my sister insists on making protein bars in bulk. i just wanted to reply "guys, i just ate a frozen burrito for lunch." but instead, i googled my symptoms, con...