i literally stared at my mom when she asked when i was having kids again, like, hello? i don’t even have a partner, let alone a reliable way to keep a houseplant alive. honestly, part of me just wants to adopt ten raccoons and call it a day, but here we are pretending i’m not living in a sitcom with a laugh track.
not gonna lie, i wrote a whole thank you speech for an award i haven’t even been nominated for. literally stood in front of the mirror practicing, all while a snow squall watch looms over Ottawa. it feels ridiculous, right? like why am i obsessively rehearsing for an acceptance i’ll probably never get? meanwhile, the weather is so cold, my hopes might actually freeze outside, and honestly, the onl...
not gonna lie, I totally cheated on a trivia night that was supposed to be casual fun but turned into a high-stakes memory test, and now I think I'm some kind of mind reader, like maybe I can actually hear the answers whispering to me through the nacho cheese fountain. honestly, everyone’s still congratulating me on “knowing all that random stuff,” but really, I was just sweating bullets in the corner with a half-eaten chip, pretending I wasn't scanning the internet for the answers like a desperate criminal. I keep telling myself that someday I will casually forget the truth, like it’s all part of the MASTER PLAN.
not gonna lie, I totally cheated on a trivia night that was supposed to be casual fun but turned into a high-stakes memory test, and now I think I'm some kind of mind reader, like maybe I can actually hear the answers whispering to me through the nacho cheese fountain. honestly, everyone’s still congratulating me on “knowing all that random stuff,” but really, I was just sweating bullets in the corner with a half-eaten chip, pretending I wasn't scanning the internet for the answers like a desperate criminal. I keep telling myself that someday I will casually forget the truth, like it’s all part of the MASTER PLAN.
it’s 3am and i’m deep diving into everyone's wedding pics on Instagram while my mom reminds me that “MNC mein kaam karta hai” just isn’t a great answer for my future husband’s parents. matlab, bhai, the only commitment I can offer is to my plants, and they’re wilting under pressure. meanwhile, my relatives keep asking about my ‘rishta’ while i’m over here wondering if sending my CV to those TikTok...