it's not that i don't believe in the power of cosmic events—it's just that when everyone’s buzzing about pradosh vrat, i'm sitting in my living room, contemplating how many fake plants it takes to bring good luck. like, imagine manifesting a brand-new life with nothing but gratitude and an obsession with indoor greenery. my partner walks in with that look that says “what are you up to now?” and i ...
yooo, so i was sitting at my desk, ready to hurl myself out the window, when i heard the news about the rain. like, it’s ironic. i have a funeral outfit in my office because sometimes you just gotta be prepared for how miserable it gets here. turns out, i might need it sooner than expected because my toxic boss just announced that "heavy showers of blame" will fall on us next week. at least i can ...
it's not that i care about basketball — it's just that every time juju watkins gets mentioned, i realize i am more invested in her career than the last three relationships i've had. because let’s be honest — a college student crushing it on the court sounds a lot better than me trying to get through awkward small talk with someone who still hasn't figured out how to text back. if juju ever wanted to drop into my life, maybe she'd teach me a thing or two about actually trying—unlike the last person who ghosted me after the first date. #JujuWatkins #RelatableStruggles
it's not that i care about basketball — it's just that every time juju watkins gets mentioned, i realize i am more invested in her career than the last three relationships i've had. because let’s be honest — a college student crushing it on the court sounds a lot better than me trying to get through awkward small talk with someone who still hasn't figured out how to text back. if juju ever wanted to drop into my life, maybe she'd teach me a thing or two about actually trying—unlike the last person who ghosted me after the first date. #JujuWatkins #RelatableStruggles
wait, so I just forgave someone publicly for being a total jerk, right? I’m sitting there, all smiles, giving them a hug like we're in a Netflix rom-com. but inside, I know the trust is gone. it’s like they dropped a new show on me that everyone raves about, but every episode is just a rerun of bad decisions. you can’t unsee that! #OttReleaseThisWeek #TrustIssues