sometimes i make up ridiculous scenarios where i get trapped in an elevator with a stranger who has, like, an inexplicable phobia of cheese. we spend hours trying to communicate, but it literally ends with me becoming their therapist, discussing their childhood trauma over a slice of brie. honestly, it's way more entertaining than scrolling through my actual life. at least then, my future spouse k...
everyone says texting is just for fun, but when you accidentally send your very personal shopping list to the group chat instead of your mom, you realize—life can spiral out of control—where do you even begin? pickles are just cucumbers with commitment issues, but somehow now I need to explain my obsession with organic soy sauce to people who think I don’t even own a skillet—what's next? do I add ...
i literally cannot stop thinking about that time my roommate saw my search history and we both just pretended it didn’t happen. like, yes, I was researching “how to communicate with trees” and "unicorn conspiracy theories." now every time we pass each other, I imagine us having a full conversation about how to harness nature’s magic for world peace, while we both just ignore the absolute nonsense we both know is lurking in that browser history. #quirkythoughts #delusionalmanifesting
i literally cannot stop thinking about that time my roommate saw my search history and we both just pretended it didn’t happen. like, yes, I was researching “how to communicate with trees” and "unicorn conspiracy theories." now every time we pass each other, I imagine us having a full conversation about how to harness nature’s magic for world peace, while we both just ignore the absolute nonsense we both know is lurking in that browser history. #quirkythoughts #delusionalmanifesting
it’s not that I thought moving across the country for someone was a bad idea—it's just that I thought they were going to stay for more than three months. but here I am, unfollowing them on social media like it's a clean breakup instead of a postal address change. my new apartment has a view of a dumpster that I lovingly call “the monument to my poor life choices.” now I'm in a city where my best f...