it’s not that i’m broke, it’s just that my bank account now has less than the amount of snacks i bought for a single movie night. how did i spend an entire week’s worth of groceries on a “spontaneous” dinner with my ex who has the emotional depth of a kiddie pool? the only real surprise here is realizing that my wallet is now a black hole for regrets and half-baked plans.
day 12 of ignoring my friend because i found out she was telling others my biggest secret: that my romantic life is basically one big injury report. turns out, while i was defending her against “frenemies,” she was busy placing bets on my dating disasters like they're the new anfernee simons trade predictions. funny how the only thing worse than bad trades is bad friends, right? now i'm waiting fo...
ngl, I just realized all the adults were literally just pretending to know what they're doing. like, my boss asked me for life advice on his "crisis" over a slice of cold pizza in the breakroom. bro, if you can't adult without guidance from a twenty-something intern, we might need to rethink this whole thing.
ngl, I just realized all the adults were literally just pretending to know what they're doing. like, my boss asked me for life advice on his "crisis" over a slice of cold pizza in the breakroom. bro, if you can't adult without guidance from a twenty-something intern, we might need to rethink this whole thing.
ever wonder how you could end up sending heart emojis to your ex at 3am just because you remembered they still owe you that one pair of socks they claimed was a "vintage gift" when you both know it was just a thrift shop disaster from that time you went matching to a party and somehow, between late-night impulse decisions and scrolling through old memories, I’ve morphed into the exact cliche I use...