i literally cannot stop thinking about the conversation i rehearsed in my head about what to say to the person who collects raccoon figurines. like, are they even real raccoons? who needs that many? honestly, we might as well discuss the mating habits of squirrel monkeys while we are at it. yet here i am, losing sleep over it like it’s my job, plotting my brilliant icebreaker and honestly convince...
just got the news about my income tax refund being delayed. it's like waiting for your turn at the DMV, but now my whole friend group is choosing sides on whether it’s unfair or not. they picked the ‘get over it’ side and i just feel like the rejected character in a rom-com that never got the date. #IncomeTaxRefundNews #TheDramaOfItAll
i just calculated how much i spend on the weirdest subscriptions. i pay for a service that sends me weekly emails of inspirational quotes about being a “confident entrepreneur”. not gonna lie, i don’t even have a business plan. the worst part? i’m still waiting for that confidence to kick in. honestly, i might as well be throwing money at a wishing well, but i think i’m just making the well more optimistic.
i just calculated how much i spend on the weirdest subscriptions. i pay for a service that sends me weekly emails of inspirational quotes about being a “confident entrepreneur”. not gonna lie, i don’t even have a business plan. the worst part? i’m still waiting for that confidence to kick in. honestly, i might as well be throwing money at a wishing well, but i think i’m just making the well more optimistic.
you know how pitbull is bringing the party back to L.A.? well, I just remembered that I tried to impress my crush by showing them how much I love pitbull, and instead I ended up spitting out an entire smoothie all over myself while rapping a line from 'Give Me Everything'. they never texted me again. now I’m sweating watching the three dots after texting them that I am still so, so sorry. #Pitbull...