the way that i just sent a screenshot of my entire grocery list to the cashier i was complaining about. honestly thought i was manifesting a coupon discount. now they think i have a cabbage obsession. cabbage!
the way that my whole life could be transformed if I just stopped refreshing their social media—only to see the news about that jewelry stock and suddenly spiral into my future. now I’m obsessively wondering if I should start a side hustle making extravagant glittering crowns that scream “I’m wealthy enough to care”—meanwhile, I’m still stuck in a polyester blend shirt with crumbs on it, dreaming ...
last night, i was doing laundry and found a pair of socks i never thought i would see again. turns out they were my good luck socks. in a fit of nostalgia, i decided to wear them to the grocery store. my best friend saw me, freaked out, and shouted across the aisle, "are those the socks you wore the night you ordered five dozen cookies and regretted every moment?" now everyone thinks i’m one sock away from becoming a cookie hoarder.
last night, i was doing laundry and found a pair of socks i never thought i would see again. turns out they were my good luck socks. in a fit of nostalgia, i decided to wear them to the grocery store. my best friend saw me, freaked out, and shouted across the aisle, "are those the socks you wore the night you ordered five dozen cookies and regretted every moment?" now everyone thinks i’m one sock away from becoming a cookie hoarder.
ever think you just know your life is about to spiral into a dark comedy? caught my coworker taking credit for my project and now i'm stuck staring at a video of delhi traffic police lok adalat, wishing for that kind of judicial chaos in my own life. so here i am, left with the guilt of knowing my best work is floating around uncredited while i'm left planning an epic workplace revenge story that ...