General: Hey friends, just a heads up! A major data breach has affected 750,000 people li…

ok but I just overheard my family talking about how I need to “stop daydreaming” about that guy in the NFL I saw on TV once. like, obviously I know he doesn’t know I exist, but I definitely have a whole future planned out with him in my mind. i mean, i bought a jersey in my size… for our future kids, obviously. #Nfl #delulu

i used to think thirty was like, the OLD AGE of adulthood. now its creeping up and my skin is already showing signs of a fight it might lose. meanwhile, im scrolling through NFL game predictions as if they hold the answers to my midlife crisis. i just paused my entire life for an update on playoff odds, when really, all i need is to find a wrinkle cream that WORKS. #Nfl #crisis

why is it that I found out my neighbor is opening a pottery studio through a community board? honestly, it feels like an unwritten rule that I should have received an engraved invitation or at least a smoke signal. now I have imaginary beef with them because I literally just made a plan to invest my life savings into knitting instead. #artsyfartsy #potterywarriors