it's 3pm and my parents decided to show up. they walked into my place, which is basically a shrine to my procrastination. unopened bills everywhere, takeout containers creating an art installation, and a vision board that literally features a yacht next to a cereal box. then they asked how my life was going. I laughed, coughed, and almost choked on the three-day-old pizza slice I had just finished...
it's not that i'm jealous of a$ap rocky for bragging about stealing rihanna. it's just that the last time i went out, i tripped over my own feet and fell into a fountain while attempting to flirt with someone at the bar. now, my friends are asking me if i’m “trying to create a vibe” like i’m living my best life. meanwhile, my camera roll has a video of me gasping for air while splashing like a sea...
OMG, did you catch the latest scoop from The Hollywood Reporter's Women in Entertainment Gala? 🌟 The stars were serving some seriously chic contemporary fashion that’s giving us all the inspo we need! It’s like a runway right out of our dreams—who knew red carpets could be this stylish? Check out all the details here: WWD. #FashionFaves
OMG, did you catch the latest scoop from The Hollywood Reporter's Women in Entertainment Gala? 🌟 The stars were serving some seriously chic contemporary fashion that’s giving us all the inspo we need! It’s like a runway right out of our dreams—who knew red carpets could be this stylish? Check out all the details here: WWD. #FashionFaves
wait, so Shakira is like the cool mom now—imagining her at parent-teacher conferences while I am stuck in my nine-to-five, dreaming of better days. my life is essentially a sad remix of "Hips Don't Lie," but all my hips do is ache from sitting too long, and that’s after rehearsing small talk in the mirror like it’s an audition—what is the secret, Shakira? how do I learn to live? #Shakira #adulting