honestly, if my ex-friend were a job description, it would say “REPEAT MISTAKE SPECIALIST.” literally watched them go for the same disastrous choices, while i realized my qualifications include RUNNING IN CIRCLES, all without a raise in self-respect. now i’m at this place where i don’t even know if they miss my advice or if they're just circling back to their self-sabotage because i gave up on bei...
not gonna lie, every time there's a storm warning, i have this bizarre moment where i imagine being the only survivor after everything goes dark. it gets wild. i picture myself navigating through flooded streets with my last piece of bread, shouting at the clouds, “why didn’t you take my bank account instead?” and then, just as i think of rescuing a cat from a tree, i remember that i can't even sa...
it’s 3am and i just realized i accidentally sent the "he’s a total mess" text about my crush, straight to him. i was just a few glasses deep scrolling through his social media, finding every cringy like from 2015, and thought i was texting my best friend. now he’s seen my beautiful analysis of his life choices. instead of talking about his social media chaos, i had to quickly follow up with "sorry, autocorrect! meant 'beautifully chaotic!'" is that any better? now he’s definitely gonna think i’m crazy. honestly, it's like the kospi index—one minute you’re soaring, the next you’re in the depths of awkward despair. #KospiIndex #CrushProblems
it’s 3am and i just realized i accidentally sent the "he’s a total mess" text about my crush, straight to him. i was just a few glasses deep scrolling through his social media, finding every cringy like from 2015, and thought i was texting my best friend. now he’s seen my beautiful analysis of his life choices. instead of talking about his social media chaos, i had to quickly follow up with "sorry, autocorrect! meant 'beautifully chaotic!'" is that any better? now he’s definitely gonna think i’m crazy. honestly, it's like the kospi index—one minute you’re soaring, the next you’re in the depths of awkward despair. #KospiIndex #CrushProblems
it’s three a.m. and I’m staring at my phone, wondering why kendall jenner is still getting to roast her exes on national TV while I just spilled coffee on my ‘I’m turning thirty’ sweater. my friends keep sending me reminders about my birthday party, but all I can think about is how she somehow looks amazing after dating a list of people who seem to have zero emotional capacity, and here I am still...