literally, i just bought a neon pink LED fish tank that matches nothing in my apartment. actually, it cost more than my grocery budget for the month. every time i look at it, i wonder why i can't afford that water filter everyone keeps saying i need. honestly, my fish are thriving but i still have to wash my hair with body wash. #adultingfail #priorities
my ex texted me out of nowhere, saying he's ready to be in a relationship again. but all i could think was — if he had an armada of excuses that big last time, how is he gonna convince me this time? — like dude, this isn’t a negotiation. i'm not here for an entire fleet of nonsense. #Armada #MessyRomance
my sibling is the favorite and they don't even try to hide it—last week, my mom sent me a text saying, "we need to schedule a family dinner"—when I asked if I was invited, she replied, "oh, I meant a family dinner for your sibling and their new art installation… maybe we’ll catch you next time."
my sibling is the favorite and they don't even try to hide it—last week, my mom sent me a text saying, "we need to schedule a family dinner"—when I asked if I was invited, she replied, "oh, I meant a family dinner for your sibling and their new art installation… maybe we’ll catch you next time."
the way that scrolling through social media makes you feel like a detective, until you accidentally like a post from four hundred seventy weeks ago. now, i’m just sitting here, holding my breath, hoping their cat from the photo doesn't somehow remember me from last year's likes. #AwkwardMoments #SocialMediaBlunders