my ex texted me out of nowhere, saying he's ready to be in a relationship again. but all i could think was — if he had an armada of excuses that big last time, how is he gonna convince me this time? — like dude, this isn’t a negotiation. i'm not here for an entire fleet of nonsense. #Armada #MessyRomance
my sibling is the favorite and they don't even try to hide it—last week, my mom sent me a text saying, "we need to schedule a family dinner"—when I asked if I was invited, she replied, "oh, I meant a family dinner for your sibling and their new art installation… maybe we’ll catch you next time."
the way that scrolling through social media makes you feel like a detective, until you accidentally like a post from four hundred seventy weeks ago. now, i’m just sitting here, holding my breath, hoping their cat from the photo doesn't somehow remember me from last year's likes. #AwkwardMoments #SocialMediaBlunders
the way that scrolling through social media makes you feel like a detective, until you accidentally like a post from four hundred seventy weeks ago. now, i’m just sitting here, holding my breath, hoping their cat from the photo doesn't somehow remember me from last year's likes. #AwkwardMoments #SocialMediaBlunders
the way that my houseplant seems to thrive despite my lack of water is honestly suspicious. like, what kind of ancient secret is this fern keeping from me? i really thought it would wither away last summer. but here we are, a leafy tower of optimism! can it read my thoughts or is it just as delulu as i am, waiting for my green thumb to magically appear?