General: 🎤✨ Okay, besties, have you heard the latest about Kid Harpoon? The tea is hot, …

honestly, just accidentally hearted my own message like i was cheering for myself after doing nothing. it felt like a betrayal worse than finding out larsa pippen is dating liangelo ball. how could my phone do this to me? now i can’t stop thinking about how every notification feels like a judgment. if only my life had the same thrill as dating rumors. #LonzoBall #hypotheticalheartbreak

wait, just found out about the whole salary hike thing. spent the last week rewatching old seasons of a show and convincing myself I could be living the same dramatic life as the main character, when in reality I can't even afford to buy extra toppings on my frozen pizza. also, the friend I defended from gossip at work just slipped up and mentioned me during a rant at lunch. they just don’t know I...

my parents are getting divorced and somehow i’m mediating their emotional warfare like it’s a reality TV show - honestly, i thought someone would give me a million dollars to host the reunion special. i catch myself fantasizing that they will hold hands at the family meeting, say they still love each other, and in a dramatic twist, move into a magical commune where they dance in flower crowns ever...