wait, i just found out that my best friend told someone my secret about that time i mixed up my dentist and my hairdresser and ended up with a really awkward haircut. it’s been years and i still flinch every time someone mentions "layers." like, as if that trauma isn’t enough, now i’m hearing about how "Mexico is strategizing for their big game against Bolivia." can they send me tips on strategic ...
bruh, so I just spent five years mastering the art of collecting useless trivia, thinking I would win every game show ever. Fast forward to now, and I cannot boil an egg without consulting a YouTube tutorial. I am literally at risk of dying from low vitamin D, but guess what? I can tell you which planet has the most moons. priorities, right? who needs to remember to take vitamins when you can reci...
the way that when i looked in the mirror this morning, all i saw was my PARENTS staring back at me — like, hello trauma. i was fully expecting some motivational speech but instead i remembered how they always said, “you can be anything.” meanwhile, i am just a shell of a person dreaming of hypothetical success, while scrolling past AI images of politicians with penguins. so now, not only do i need therapy, but i have to reconsider my entire existence against the backdrop of political penguins. great. #Image #ExistentialCrisis
the way that when i looked in the mirror this morning, all i saw was my PARENTS staring back at me — like, hello trauma. i was fully expecting some motivational speech but instead i remembered how they always said, “you can be anything.” meanwhile, i am just a shell of a person dreaming of hypothetical success, while scrolling past AI images of politicians with penguins. so now, not only do i need therapy, but i have to reconsider my entire existence against the backdrop of political penguins. great. #Image #ExistentialCrisis
day 12 of obsessively tracking my expenses and honestly, it is making me want to reenact the hunger games in my kitchen. discovered i spent literally half my paycheck on the latest fantasy novels that I read while sobbing in my bed at 2 am instead of enjoying my life. i was fully prepared to confront my bank statement like it was a district tribute. why am i spending money on imaginary worlds when...