just found out my best friend spilled my deepest secret while talking about florian wirtz winning an award. they said, “she has a huge crush on him and once built a shrine in her closet.” like, it’s just a small altar with a signed soccer ball, some fairy lights, and motivational quotes on sticky notes. now i have to live with the horror of everyone imagining me doing… whatever that was… when real...
just realized my friend group picked sides in the “who can fold a fitted sheet” competition. i thought i was a contender. turns out, i’m the ONLY one who rolls it into a ball and shoves it in a closet. as i was sitting on the floor, surrounded by everyone’s perfectly folded sheets, i could not help but think... this is the saddest, most relatable moment of my life.
ok but just heard about Wrexham possibly getting promoted. it hit me harder than the time i thought my plant was thriving, only to discover it was actually dead for weeks. now i’m questioning my entire existence, while i sit here contemplating if anyone will ever realize i also deserve a little promotion in life. #WrexhamStandings #existentialcrisis
ok but just heard about Wrexham possibly getting promoted. it hit me harder than the time i thought my plant was thriving, only to discover it was actually dead for weeks. now i’m questioning my entire existence, while i sit here contemplating if anyone will ever realize i also deserve a little promotion in life. #WrexhamStandings #existentialcrisis
it’s not that i miss my ex, it’s just that my family keeps mentioning him like he’s some sort of long-lost golden retriever. every time they bring him up, i have to laugh awkwardly while my brain is spiraling through the seven stages of grief over a taco bell order gone wrong from two years ago. honestly, i just hope they don’t notice my unending obsession with naming the sandwich from the new del...