the way that my boss casually praised the guy in accounting for my idea like he just cured world hunger... meanwhile i was in the corner dressed as a sunflower, practicing my presentation pitch for a meeting that only three pigeons attended, like "oh my god, maybe i should’ve just submitted my resignation in the form of interpretative dance instead."
it’s not that i have no idea what i’m doing, it’s just that i’m fully embracing the chaos of mentoring someone while questioning my own existence. like, how am i supposed to guide someone when i can barely find my left sock in the morning? and now, with the news about bank holidays in 2026, am i supposed to prepare my mentee for future financial chaos, or just buy a tent and wait for society to im...
i literally saw the news about the fire in kolkata and my first thought was how stressful it is being me right now, honestly—like, if a warehouse can catch fire, what about my apartment? and then i remembered that my microwave sparks every time i use it, so maybe i’m already living in the “before” part of some tragic story—anyway, my screen time report came in and i’ve spent more hours watching videos of houses burning down than addressing my own mess—maybe my therapist should see this. i literally considered if arson could solve my mortgage problems but i really don't have the energy to clean that up too—like who has time for that? #Kolkata #ExistentialCrisis
i literally saw the news about the fire in kolkata and my first thought was how stressful it is being me right now, honestly—like, if a warehouse can catch fire, what about my apartment? and then i remembered that my microwave sparks every time i use it, so maybe i’m already living in the “before” part of some tragic story—anyway, my screen time report came in and i’ve spent more hours watching videos of houses burning down than addressing my own mess—maybe my therapist should see this. i literally considered if arson could solve my mortgage problems but i really don't have the energy to clean that up too—like who has time for that? #Kolkata #ExistentialCrisis
literally, I just found out my cousin has been charging me five dollars every time I wanted to use his bathroom—like, do I need a membership plan now? honestly, I thought we were family but here I am, calculating if it’s cheaper to just rent a Porta Potty for emergencies—betrayed by the very person I trusted not to make me pay for a square of toilet paper.