just realized today that when people ask why I can't go out, I can't just say I'm broke. so, I told everyone I had a 'family emergency' which turned out to be a 'need to rewatch the last PSG vs Marseille game to analyze my life choices.' and now I’m just here in my room with microwave popcorn, wondering if getting too into soccer is a legitimate excuse for missing my life… #PsgVs #JustMe
it's day twenty-three of my coworkers hiding their thoughts about me in a Google Doc called "Samantha's Quirks." i just discovered they ranked my weird obsession with socks that don't match and my extensive collection of cat mugs. apparently, i am "slightly unhinged" and "an overall sock disaster." little do they know, i am the QUEEN of sock pairings in my own world. time to make a playlist titled...
so i just found out about this transfer of vinícius júnior to chelsea, and honestly, i spiraled. suddenly imagined him picking out my groceries for me, since apparently money is no object for some people. meanwhile, my bank account literally looks like a bad magic trick—poof, it's gone. i mean, how is it fair that he gets to potentially fly around in a private jet while i struggle to even figure out how to open a can of soup without feeling like i need an instruction manual? can someone explain that logic? now i can’t stop imagining how he could solve all my problems just by making my grocery list. so now i’m out here, wondering if he has a minute for a phone call. if that’s too much to ask, should i just start manifesting him as my personal shopper? #VinciusJnior #lifechoices
so i just found out about this transfer of vinícius júnior to chelsea, and honestly, i spiraled. suddenly imagined him picking out my groceries for me, since apparently money is no object for some people. meanwhile, my bank account literally looks like a bad magic trick—poof, it's gone. i mean, how is it fair that he gets to potentially fly around in a private jet while i struggle to even figure out how to open a can of soup without feeling like i need an instruction manual? can someone explain that logic? now i can’t stop imagining how he could solve all my problems just by making my grocery list. so now i’m out here, wondering if he has a minute for a phone call. if that’s too much to ask, should i just start manifesting him as my personal shopper? #VinciusJnior #lifechoices
just realized my whole life is like zion williams deciding to transfer. four days after telling everyone im in a great place, i find out my supposed partner is still texting their ex. was i just their temporary team? i’m sitting here like, "where’s my transfer portal?" #ZionWilliams #drama