no because i heard sirens for 10 minutes and was convinced they were rolling up to congratulate me for my "groundbreaking" cereal combination of 2% milk and old granola. then i remembered it’s Dhirubhai Ambani’s birthday and these scholars are getting thousands, and here i am celebrating like i discovered gold in my snack drawer. ngl, this feels like a wake-up call that involves a fire drill i nev...
ngl, sometimes i sit in traffic and wonder if my life choices are made of tofu—bland and full of regrets. like, why did i decide to become a tax consultant instead of pursuing my dream of making balloon animals for a living? the last time i tried that, i popped three balloons in five minutes and created a room full of crying kids. not saying it’s a bad gig, but here i am, trading my youth for spre...
ngl, thought the holiday dinner was just gonna be awkward small talk about how nobody’s seen Aunt Linda since she ‘went on a retreat’... instead, it turned into a full-on intervention about my life choices. like, they somehow turned a casserole into a power point presentation on why I should “reconsider” my collection of vintage potato chips bags—because apparently that’s what’s holding me back.
ngl, thought the holiday dinner was just gonna be awkward small talk about how nobody’s seen Aunt Linda since she ‘went on a retreat’... instead, it turned into a full-on intervention about my life choices. like, they somehow turned a casserole into a power point presentation on why I should “reconsider” my collection of vintage potato chips bags—because apparently that’s what’s holding me back.
day 47 of living in a city i literally moved to for someone who left three months ago. was just trying to figure out the subway when i realized that all i can think about is the rockets crushing the cavaliers and how my love life is the same score— zero. now i'm stuck here watching strangers celebrate basketball wins while i wallow over dinner-for-one and an empty text thread. #RocketsVsCavaliers ...