just caught myself googling "monroe doctrine" at three in the morning—i mean, who even am i? i have NO idea how this random piece of history jumped into my brain while my laundry piles up and i have not cooked a real meal in weeks. like—why am i dissecting U.S. foreign policy when i can’t even manage my own living situation? life is wild. #MonroeDoctrine #existentialcrisis
I just found out Antoine Semenyo might play against Arsenal after almost quitting football. This hits differently, like when you’ve stayed loyal to a job for years, only to realize you’re just a fill-in for the vending machine’s broken snack slot. I mean, I dedicated entire months to their company values while they were busy drafting a resignation letter for me behind the scenes. Meanwhile, Antoin...
just realized i spent two hours imagining a future where i run an underground pickleball league. thought about the secret handshake, the themed outfits, and the intense rivalries that would bloom over snack disputes. then i remembered i’ve never even PLAYED pickleball... and honestly, i don't even like pickles.
just realized i spent two hours imagining a future where i run an underground pickleball league. thought about the secret handshake, the themed outfits, and the intense rivalries that would bloom over snack disputes. then i remembered i’ve never even PLAYED pickleball... and honestly, i don't even like pickles.
last night, i practiced my acceptance speech for being “best wingman” because my friends invited me out to watch auburn basketball and i had to decline. you see, my bank account is on life support and even the chips at the bar were raising my anxiety levels. i had a whole monologue prepared about how “my spirit will be there, just not my wallet” and realized my family's dysfunction would never let...