just found out that short-form content is all the rage now. the last time i attempted to be trendy, i made a whole plotline in my head about the new guy at work saving my life during a zombie apocalypse. turns out he doesn't even know my name. now i spend my time scrolling, getting sadder by the TikTok, wondering if i was the zombie all along. #TheRiseOfShortformContentTikto #cringe
wait, so i told my friends i couldn't come out because i was "waiting for an important package." but really i was just deep in a marathon of reorganizing my sock drawer by color, fabric type, and sock height. like, my life was in chaos and the socks had to take charge. now i have to explain my social absence, which is WAY harder than arranging my sock drawer.
just sat through an hour-long presentation on why office plants are our best friends. my boss literally said "we're like family here" right before announcing there will be no raises this year. i now expect my snake plant to pay the bills and maybe throw in some emotional support on the side. honestly, if my peace lily starts giving me life advice, i’m out here in a therapy session with flora while dreaming of a salary raise that will never come.
just sat through an hour-long presentation on why office plants are our best friends. my boss literally said "we're like family here" right before announcing there will be no raises this year. i now expect my snake plant to pay the bills and maybe throw in some emotional support on the side. honestly, if my peace lily starts giving me life advice, i’m out here in a therapy session with flora while dreaming of a salary raise that will never come.
honestly, I just accidentally liked a picture of a stranger from literally 47 weeks ago, and now I can’t stop thinking about how they probably assumed I was following their entire life story. meanwhile, I’m over here trying to manage my existential crisis like I’m their personal cheerleader from the sidelines. are we doing a backstory for our love life now? I was just wondering if they prefer pine...