literally just spent twenty minutes imagining how to confront the pizza guy about my order being wrong. like, I practiced my tone. it was going to be assertive yet polite. then I remembered I literally only ordered a side of extra ranch. at this point, I am more prepared for a TED talk than a conversation about salad dressing.
it’s 2am and i just spent four hours contemplating which elton john song to use as the soundtrack for my ‘living alone with 15 plants and no social life’ montage. like, i literally settled on “tiny dancer” only to realize—why am i planning a montage? my reality is not a movie. also, how do you turn kneecaps into jewelry? because at this point, i’m ready to sell some body parts just to afford a tic...
it’s wild seeing someone you grew up with act like they have no clue who you are, while i’m here still remembering when we used to draw comic book characters together in that shady treehouse—do i need to hire a personal injury attorney for the emotional trauma of it all? just because we both have jobs now doesn’t mean you can pretend i didn’t accidentally stick you with a pencil that one time—clearly, the universe is punishing me for bringing it up again. #PersonalInjuryAttorney #DramaOfThePast
it’s wild seeing someone you grew up with act like they have no clue who you are, while i’m here still remembering when we used to draw comic book characters together in that shady treehouse—do i need to hire a personal injury attorney for the emotional trauma of it all? just because we both have jobs now doesn’t mean you can pretend i didn’t accidentally stick you with a pencil that one time—clearly, the universe is punishing me for bringing it up again. #PersonalInjuryAttorney #DramaOfThePast
honestly, I just checked their social media again, even though I know I shouldn’t—like scrolling through feeds of happy people while I’m over here still getting ghosted by a bread recipe. it feels like watching the 'melbourne victory vs sydney fc' highlights while I'm stuck in a perpetual overtime game of life. can someone send help or a time machine? my mom's convinced I’m still making a vision b...