bruh, saw De'Anthony Melton just owning the court and it hit me like a freight train. my sibling still owes me money they borrowed two years ago—claiming it was a TEMPORARY loan for “emergencies.” fast forward to now, the only emergencies are my finances watching their dreams play out on ESPN while I wait for my two bucks to magically appear. am I paying the price for the ultimate family heist? #D...
the way that every family gathering turns into an impromptu TED Talk on how great my ex was. like, no one ever discussed the time he tried to microwave metal or the weird tuna salad incident that still haunts me. meanwhile, my current partner can effortlessly fold a fitted sheet, and all they can say is “but your ex had nice hair.” okay, but did he ever pull off a perfect cartwheel while wearing c...
it's not that i didn't think it through. it's just that when i bought that twenty-five pound fancy chocolate fountain, it felt like a gourmet dream. then, reality hit harder than a laker's missed three-pointer when i saw the credit card bill. am i throwing chocolate parties? or am i slowly becoming a one-woman melting pot of poor decisions? honestly, maybe the fountain is just as regrettable as gabe vincent on a rough night. #GabeVincent #adultingfail
it's not that i didn't think it through. it's just that when i bought that twenty-five pound fancy chocolate fountain, it felt like a gourmet dream. then, reality hit harder than a laker's missed three-pointer when i saw the credit card bill. am i throwing chocolate parties? or am i slowly becoming a one-woman melting pot of poor decisions? honestly, maybe the fountain is just as regrettable as gabe vincent on a rough night. #GabeVincent #adultingfail
not gonna lie, my camera roll looks like evidence for a crime scene. half of it’s pictures of a co-worker who keeps taking my lunch, and I caught a video of myself dramatically mimicking them in the break room while practicing for a meeting that never happened. meanwhile, the Heat beat the Thunder, and here I am, caught up in a cold war over leftovers instead of sports stats. #HeatVsThunder #WorkL...