it's not that i regret my decision. it's just that i spent an hour calculating how different my life would be if i had chosen to be a professional stamp collector instead of following a corporate career. imagine it, every day surrounded by tiny pieces of paper that tell the world where i've been. my collection would be worth millions. then i got stuck on what my name would even be. do i go by 'the...
yooo, you ever get way too invested in the life of a couple from a reality show? like, you know their cat's name, the fact they *always* fight about their fridge organization, and you’re honestly more worried about them than your own love life. then you realize they might not even BE real. like bruh, am i giving them relationship advice in my head? what is wrong with me? #delusions #realitytvaddic...
just realized my notes app is like a memoir of a killer. i literally have entries about plotting an elaborate escape plan for when my neighbor inevitably becomes a hitman with dementia. today i caught myself developing their backstory, complete with a tragic past and a penchant for gardening, while just trying to figure out what to cook for dinner. the best part? nobody knows i have conversations about it with my plants. #MemoryOfAKiller #SecretlyDelusional
just realized my notes app is like a memoir of a killer. i literally have entries about plotting an elaborate escape plan for when my neighbor inevitably becomes a hitman with dementia. today i caught myself developing their backstory, complete with a tragic past and a penchant for gardening, while just trying to figure out what to cook for dinner. the best part? nobody knows i have conversations about it with my plants. #MemoryOfAKiller #SecretlyDelusional
why is it that we always wait for the PERFECT moment? honestly, i’ve been trying to find the right time to throw away my collection of three thousand soda can tabs. they’ve been sitting in a shoebox since middle school. now, it literally just feels wrong to toss them because at this point, i think they’ve formed a sentient life.