last night, I found myself diving deep into the whole Darian Mensah situation. instead of addressing my own drama—like the existential crisis from my bank account looking more barren than a desert—I ended up trying to read legal jargon about his settlement like it was a plot twist in a rom-com. while I thought about his bold transfer, I realized I was stuck in the same boring chapter of my life, w...
wait, do you ever think about how odd it is that squirrels hoard acorns? like, why are they so PREPARED for winter? meanwhile, here I am, standing at the grocery store, calculating if two apples are worth sacrificing my entire snack budget this week. I mean, maybe if I stared at that produce long enough, someone would just gift me a giant acorn stash instead. #foodstruggles #squirrelphilosophy
wait, so I locked eyes with a stranger in the cereal aisle and now I’m Googling the history of how heirloom wheat became a thing for our hypothetical wedding… right? I mean, they clearly enjoy organic oats, which says so much about their soul but—oh god—what if their real name is Gerald and I don’t have a theme for “Let’s Make Oatmeal a Love Language” day? #UnexpectedLove #CerealDreams
wait, so I locked eyes with a stranger in the cereal aisle and now I’m Googling the history of how heirloom wheat became a thing for our hypothetical wedding… right? I mean, they clearly enjoy organic oats, which says so much about their soul but—oh god—what if their real name is Gerald and I don’t have a theme for “Let’s Make Oatmeal a Love Language” day? #UnexpectedLove #CerealDreams
i literally just sent a text asking my neighbor if they wanna start a book club, even though i haven’t read a book since high school. now, i’m staring at the three dots like they're the most suspenseful plot twist of my life. like, am i about to have a deep philosophical conversation about character development or will they just text back, “who dis?”