literally just checked my camera roll and I might as well have a detailed alibi for an unsolved crime. like, I have a five-minute video of a cat trying to catch its tail, but there's also a photo of a sink covered in pizza sauce, and honestly, I can't explain that to anyone without sounding completely unhinged. if I get called to court, I will need a very good lawyer, and possibly some therapy. #c...
not gonna lie, i just got voluntold to work the weekend again while trying to watch the trailer for that new taylor sheridan thing. so there i was, tearing up about fictional cowboys, only to realize i’m just a ranch hand in this soul-sucking office, moving papers like a pack mule. instead of sipping whiskey by the campfire with kurt russell, i’m going to be face deep in spreadsheets wondering how...
literally just woke up at three am thinking about the time I walked into a historical reenactment museum, looked around, and genuinely asked a soldier in costume if they had to pay for parking. like, was my confusion about time travel that deep? they stared at me like I was the weirdest time traveler ever. moral of the story—don’t question where the future parking meters might be when you are in the 1800s.
literally just woke up at three am thinking about the time I walked into a historical reenactment museum, looked around, and genuinely asked a soldier in costume if they had to pay for parking. like, was my confusion about time travel that deep? they stared at me like I was the weirdest time traveler ever. moral of the story—don’t question where the future parking meters might be when you are in the 1800s.
i just ran into someone who used to be my best friend growing up. they acted like they didn’t recognize me at all. like, wow, did we go to the same kindergarten or did i just imagine the dramatic fall on the monkey bars that got us both sent to the nurse? maybe their memory took a nosedive right along with my last five years of budgeting skills. #childhoodmemories #awkwardencounters