just had my parents show up unannounced and they caught me mid-painting my toenails bright neon green while listening to a two hour mix of elevator music. i panicked, shoved the polish under the couch and started apologizing to the carpet for, you know, making it suffer through my life choices. they were like, “are you okay?” and i almost said, “do you mean spiritually or in regard to my living co...
yooo, remember when i thought thirty was old? fast forward, and i’m panicking over the fact that my plant collection has more stability than my life right now. every time i walk past my succulents, i ask them if they want to do an adulting workshop. they don’t respond, which is making me question my social skills and life choices all at once.
bruh, I just heard about Ananya Panday's grand wedding plans. Meanwhile, I am sitting here still planning my solo getaway from all the awkward small talk at the next family gathering. You would think my notes app is a love letter to an invisible partner, but it’s actually a funeral dirge for my dating life. I caught myself drafting vows to someone who I’ve only ever seen in passing, all while I keep spilling spaghetti on my favorite shirt during “date night” at home alone. so yeah, thanks Ananya, your wedding dreams are really putting my life in perspective... #AnanyaPandey #ForeverAlone
bruh, I just heard about Ananya Panday's grand wedding plans. Meanwhile, I am sitting here still planning my solo getaway from all the awkward small talk at the next family gathering. You would think my notes app is a love letter to an invisible partner, but it’s actually a funeral dirge for my dating life. I caught myself drafting vows to someone who I’ve only ever seen in passing, all while I keep spilling spaghetti on my favorite shirt during “date night” at home alone. so yeah, thanks Ananya, your wedding dreams are really putting my life in perspective... #AnanyaPandey #ForeverAlone
just found out my situationship introduced me as "a friend" to someone else at a bar. like, i need to re-evaluate how i define our bond. i mean, at least we’re not playing a losing game like that fenerbahçe - aston villa match, because right now, i feel like i'm losing in my own life drama. #FenerbahceAstonVilla #RelatableMisery