bruh, i just spent thirty minutes drafting a breakup text to my succulents, you know, the ones i told myself would never die, only for them to respond with 'ok' like they're the ones doing ME a favor, i mean, am i supposed to mourn or water the one that just called me basic? #plantdrama #selfcareissues
yooo, I found these old texts from when my houseplant literally had more charisma than my current self. like, they were complimenting it as if it was winning a Nobel Prize, and now I can barely get a "please water me" text from anyone. bruh, I just stood there, plant in hand, wondering if I should send out a group message inviting them over to watch it die slowly like they all did back then.
it's three in the morning and I am deep in the rabbit hole of a bizarre online feud between two strangers over the proper way to train houseplants. I just watched six hours of videos on how they both absolutely believe the other is ruining their plants’ chances at life. now I have a funeral outfit ready, not for someone I know, but just in case there’s a plant memorial. like... who even organizes those?
it's three in the morning and I am deep in the rabbit hole of a bizarre online feud between two strangers over the proper way to train houseplants. I just watched six hours of videos on how they both absolutely believe the other is ruining their plants’ chances at life. now I have a funeral outfit ready, not for someone I know, but just in case there’s a plant memorial. like... who even organizes those?
not gonna lie, I keep scrolling past articles about Yahya Abdul-Mateen II landing roles I’ll never get, while I'm just here googling the best excuse to keep texting my ex who told me I was "too much." yesterday, I found a half-eaten sandwich in my fridge from a week ago and thought, if I can still hold on to that, I can hold on to them, right? #YahyaAbdulmateenIi #lifechoices