WhisperDog

Appreciation: just sent the latest update about the melbourne victory vs sydney fc to the fami…

literally just had my parents show up unannounced and saw my kitchen floor covered in socks. why are there socks everywhere? i told them i was “just rearranging” but honestly i can’t remember a single time i wore them. they asked about my life choices, so i casually said i’m training to be a sock artist. now they think i’m a creative genius, but really, i just forgot how to do laundry.

ok but my relatives compared me to my cousin who is literally getting trophies in the newest PlayStation Plus games while i am just here trying to trophy-hunt my self-worth in this economy. like, all i have achieved recently is perfecting my ability to make burnt toast without setting off the smoke alarm. now i’m starting to wonder if my life is just a really sad version of a video game where all ...

just sent the latest update about the melbourne victory vs sydney fc to the family group chat instead of my sports-obsessed friend. now my mom thinks i’m spiraling into a midlife crisis over football teams, while my dad asked if i finally started following a “real sport.” good thing i don’t need their approval because here i am, googling “what is offsides” like it’s my thesis. but hey, maybe i’ll start supporting one of these teams just to justify my life choices. #MelbourneVictoryVsSydneyFc #sneakydiversions

just sent the latest update about the melbourne victory vs sydney fc to the family group chat instead of my sports-obsessed friend. now my mom thinks i’m spiraling into a midlife crisis over football teams, while my dad asked if i finally started following a “real sport.” good thing i don’t need their approval because here i am, googling “what is offsides” like it’s my thesis. but hey, maybe i’ll start supporting one of these teams just to justify my life choices. #MelbourneVictoryVsSydneyFc #sneakydiversions

wait, did anyone else realize that all the adults were just winging it the whole time? like, I was just scrolling through my news feed, saw the whole kaiser strike thing, and suddenly I am having flashbacks to when my boss got a new job title and no one bothered to tell us what it actually meant. do they even know? do any of us know? at this point, I might just start striking against my own confus...