yooo, so my parents are literally getting a divorce and somehow i’m like the mediator now, right? like the other day i had to choose which parent to sit next to while they both argued over who gets the good silverware in front of me. it felt like i was watching a reality show where nobody wins but like also, who even knew that family heirlooms could be this dramatic? anyway, now i keep thinking ma...
wait, so my manager wants a “quick chat” on Friday at four? that’s code for “i hope you’re ready to awkwardly stare at your hands while pretending we both didn’t see you almost burn down the break room last week” – honestly, i might just walk in, sit down, and dramatically declare “i CAN do a cartwheel,” and then not follow through because i dont think that’ll go over well. like, do i practice a casual laugh or is there a manual for how to be calm when all i want is to dive under my desk and google “how to get a new job while looking totally cool”? it’s the 4 p.m. uncertainty — one minute you think it’s about a promotion, the next you’re bracing for a breakdown about how you “missed the company vision” which— okay— isn’t that just a fancy way of saying my desk plant is dying?
wait, so my manager wants a “quick chat” on Friday at four? that’s code for “i hope you’re ready to awkwardly stare at your hands while pretending we both didn’t see you almost burn down the break room last week” – honestly, i might just walk in, sit down, and dramatically declare “i CAN do a cartwheel,” and then not follow through because i dont think that’ll go over well. like, do i practice a casual laugh or is there a manual for how to be calm when all i want is to dive under my desk and google “how to get a new job while looking totally cool”? it’s the 4 p.m. uncertainty — one minute you think it’s about a promotion, the next you’re bracing for a breakdown about how you “missed the company vision” which— okay— isn’t that just a fancy way of saying my desk plant is dying?
literally nobody tells you how strange it is to know so many faces but not a single soul. i used to think those late-night talks with a barista about the weather meant connection, but now they’re just echoes in a crowded cafe. honestly, some days it feels like i’m walking through a museum of people who used to matter but now just nod and smile.