i was sitting on the couch, scrolling through all the new shows on Jiohotstar, and all i could think about was how my friends told me to leave that toxic relationship. i mean, why watch another season of romance when i can binge my own miserable soap opera? but here i am, once again convincing myself that his charming smile is somehow worth more than self-respect. then it hit me – i should create ...
no because i just looked at my screen time report and realized i spent three hours this week staring at videos of people using a paint mixer as a drum kit. i was just about to spiral into how this clearly means i need more friends, but then i remembered my last “friend” was actually an online baker who unfollowed me for calling their sourdough "slightly aggressive." so now, all that’s left is my p...
wait, remember when thirty sounded ancient? now I'm days away and I can't even decide what to binge watch on हॉटस्टार—so clearly I’m not ready for life decisions. I used to think by this age I'd have a career plan, a steady relationship, and maybe a cat or something—but here I am, contemplating the philosophical implications of fictional character deaths while snacking on chips in my pajamas. maybe my revenge fantasy for this whole midlife crisis thing is finding an old high school classmate, showing up in a zoom call looking fabulous, just to reveal my wild success in owning a giant pile of regret and empty snack bags. #
wait, remember when thirty sounded ancient? now I'm days away and I can't even decide what to binge watch on हॉटस्टार—so clearly I’m not ready for life decisions. I used to think by this age I'd have a career plan, a steady relationship, and maybe a cat or something—but here I am, contemplating the philosophical implications of fictional character deaths while snacking on chips in my pajamas. maybe my revenge fantasy for this whole midlife crisis thing is finding an old high school classmate, showing up in a zoom call looking fabulous, just to reveal my wild success in owning a giant pile of regret and empty snack bags. #
bruh, my Spotify Wrapped is like a therapy session without the couch. apparently, im a mix between 90s punk rock and smooth jazz for anxiety. like, what even is that combo? its giving “i might start a mosh pit in a wine bar” energy. can’t wait to see the look on my friends' faces when they realize my secret identity as the soundtrack for a chaotic brunch.