WhisperDog

Advice: you know what’s wild? I keep picking the same hideous shirt at thrift stores, an…

you ever realize your Spotify Wrapped is basically your psychological profile? like, who knew my whole personality could be summed up by a six-month obsession with whale sounds and angsty Norwegian pop? it’s like “here’s your top songs: deep emotional turmoil, existential dread, and also, sea shanties.” wow, I should really get my life together, huh?

its not that i need the early payments, its just... i accidentally sent a desperate text about needing funds to my whole family instead of just my mom. i could almost hear my aunt laughing at my plea for help. now they think im this complete mess, which, to be fair, i kind of am, but still! thanks to those early checks, i might just get to play it cool while pretending i didn’t just ask for money ...

you know what’s wild? I keep picking the same hideous shirt at thrift stores, and I’m not talking about a classic ‘I love pizza’ tee. I’m talking about an oversized, neon, graphic masterpiece that looks like it survived a rave from the nineties. can you believe it? every time I wear it, my friends raise eyebrows and act like I’m about to step on a runway. am I just a visionary or does no one else see how this bad boy truly goes with my socks and sandals look? I mean, what’s life without a little cringe, right?

you know what’s wild? I keep picking the same hideous shirt at thrift stores, and I’m not talking about a classic ‘I love pizza’ tee. I’m talking about an oversized, neon, graphic masterpiece that looks like it survived a rave from the nineties. can you believe it? every time I wear it, my friends raise eyebrows and act like I’m about to step on a runway. am I just a visionary or does no one else see how this bad boy truly goes with my socks and sandals look? I mean, what’s life without a little cringe, right?

just realized my ‘best friend’ is like that one convenience store that only stocks items when it's almost closing time. i mean, they’ll pop up in my messages for a favor, then ghost me until they need my leftover snacks from the ‘good’ party last weekend. i think i’m running a charity for emotionally unavailable grocery items instead of a friendship. #friendswithbenefits #snackstalker