not gonna lie, i literally keep buying elaborate watercolor sets even though i can barely draw a stick figure. like, i sit there all proud, imagining my future masterpieces, and then spend hours just doodling potato people instead. at this point, my entire art journey is just a very colorful shrine to my own mediocrity.
wait, so I bought a life-sized cardboard cutout of a cat wearing a tuxedo. like, obviously I didn’t need it. but it was on sale. thirty percent off, which is basically free, right? now I’m just trying to convince myself that this suave feline is the new home decor that will transform my living room into an upscale lounge.
wait, you ever stand in a crowded elevator, literally sweating under the fluorescent lights, while nodding at people discussing the weather as if you believe it actually matters? meanwhile, your brain's plotting an escape route involving a pet llama and a hot air balloon. honestly, if I just smiled and agreed to everything, maybe I could convince them I'm a professional weather consultant, even though I spend all my time staring at a crumbling muffin in the break room, contemplating my life choices.
wait, you ever stand in a crowded elevator, literally sweating under the fluorescent lights, while nodding at people discussing the weather as if you believe it actually matters? meanwhile, your brain's plotting an escape route involving a pet llama and a hot air balloon. honestly, if I just smiled and agreed to everything, maybe I could convince them I'm a professional weather consultant, even though I spend all my time staring at a crumbling muffin in the break room, contemplating my life choices.
yooo, so I locked eyes with this stranger at the grocery store last week — and now I'm deep-diving into bridal magazines while avoiding my laundry like it's a haunted graveyard. I can’t even remember their name but I've already planned the reception with seven cake tiers and a DJ who specializes in animal soundtracks. honestly, what kind of breakdown am I having over a moment of accidental eye con...