wait, you ever ghost someone because you just couldn’t find the energy to explain why you needed space? it’s like I looked at my phone, saw their message, and thought, “ugh, that’s too much.” then I got sucked into this deep dive about the melania trump documentary—I mean, it was supposed to be about her but really felt like a metaphor for how I avoided explaining myself, like, did she ever want t...
yooo, literally just got voluntold to work this weekend while my boss casually compares my dedication to this Stephon Castle hype. i mean, how am i supposed to break through the ranks when i’m stuck here slinging spreadsheets? my friends are texting me about the NBA draft like it matters while i’m counting the minutes until i can go home and sulk. can i get an emergency contract signed to escape t...
everyone is obsessing over stephon castle. meanwhile, i'm sitting here convinced that if i just manifest it hard enough, a random scout is going to burst into my office and offer me a pro contract. who cares about my Excel skills? i can definitely take a charge or two—now if only they noticed me dodging my boss every time we pass each other. watch out, world—I am practically an NBA star waiting to happen. #StephonCastle #DreamBig
everyone is obsessing over stephon castle. meanwhile, i'm sitting here convinced that if i just manifest it hard enough, a random scout is going to burst into my office and offer me a pro contract. who cares about my Excel skills? i can definitely take a charge or two—now if only they noticed me dodging my boss every time we pass each other. watch out, world—I am practically an NBA star waiting to happen. #StephonCastle #DreamBig
yooo, so my family found my secret TikTok account where I literally only review bizarre scented candles—like, who knew pickled asparagus was a thing? so I’m sitting there, and my mom's like, “are these REAL scents or just a joke?” and I’m like, “um, honestly, it’s literally both.” then my dad chimes in with, “can you not go outside smelling like wet dog and pumpkin pie?” bruh, that’s literally the...