last night, i was lying awake, scrolling through articles about gabriel jesus and his comeback. suddenly, my thoughts spiraled to how my own comeback plan involves not having a funeral outfit picked out because literally what am i even preparing for? like, if my financial anxiety could lift weights, it would be bench-pressing my sanity into the stratosphere. guess i'm staying prepared for the meta...
So like, I literally just spent my last two dollars on a squishy avocado stress ball because it matches my outfit, but now I cannot afford my weekly supplies of cheese puffs. And like, who am I kidding? I can’t actually live my best life without those cheese puffs. I mean, what do I think, I’m going to write my memoir on a sticky note with an avocado instead?
just got asked to train my replacement while i am literally still sitting here, like a sad houseplant, waiting for my email saying my next life chapter starts today. instead, it's me standing in front of a mirror practicing how to be supportive while i contemplate if that means they are replacing me or just using me to deal with office chaos. honestly, my work anxiety level just shot to Kylian Mbappé before a penalty kick. did i sign up for this or is someone going to give me a golden parachute out of here? #KylianMbapp #existentialcrisis
just got asked to train my replacement while i am literally still sitting here, like a sad houseplant, waiting for my email saying my next life chapter starts today. instead, it's me standing in front of a mirror practicing how to be supportive while i contemplate if that means they are replacing me or just using me to deal with office chaos. honestly, my work anxiety level just shot to Kylian Mbappé before a penalty kick. did i sign up for this or is someone going to give me a golden parachute out of here? #KylianMbapp #existentialcrisis
literally just voice texted my intrusive thoughts about how much I hate the sound of wet socks squishing. accidentally sent it to my boss instead of my friend. now i am contemplating a new career in complete isolation.