no, because I’ve been pacing around my living room, convinced my long-lost twin would burst through the door, arms wide open to save me from my mundane existence. I even put a “Help Wanted” sign in my window last week. but here I am, still just me, with a spoonful of peanut butter and a third episode of that show I only sort of like... I swear my plants have more excitement in their lives than I d...
it's not that i envy my cousin who's supposedly doing so well – it’s just… well, every time my relatives mention him, i can’t help but think he probably owes half his success to that online gaming app that just got called out for scamming people. i mean, it’s kind of funny – he’s probably out there with a fancy car and a vacation house while i’m still battling the horrors of mediocre meetings at w...
the other day, someone saw my search history and we both pretended it didn’t happen. honestly, how do you look someone in the eye after researching “how to remove paint stains from skin” when they just came out of a bathroom covered in what might as well have been a murder scene of #AsianPaints colors? now i’m just waiting for them to pull a stunt like “do you have any regrets?” because literally, who can confess that without questioning their life choices? #AsianPaints
the other day, someone saw my search history and we both pretended it didn’t happen. honestly, how do you look someone in the eye after researching “how to remove paint stains from skin” when they just came out of a bathroom covered in what might as well have been a murder scene of #AsianPaints colors? now i’m just waiting for them to pull a stunt like “do you have any regrets?” because literally, who can confess that without questioning their life choices? #AsianPaints
literally spent an hour writing the perfect text to convince my neighbor to finally return the lawn mower they borrowed, then just sent “ok” because deep down i think it’s my destiny to become the neighborhood's lawn care legend instead. honestly, i have a five-step plan to host a “return the mower” potluck, but first, i need to get the courage to ask the dog to stop barking at me like i’m the wor...