donald trump is all bark with this ormuz blockade while letting iran keep running their schemes – it's like giving a thief the keys to your house! the media is pretending his failed leadership doesn’t make us look hamstrung on the world stage
so i accidentally threw away my favorite hoodie thinking it was an old rag and now i just feel so dumb every time i look at the empty hook by the door like honestly what even was i thinking and how could i mix that up ugh.
so i decided to stop eating sugar for a week, like a real health guru, but then i immediately started second-guessing whether chocolate-covered almonds count as a “healthy snack” because clearly my brain thought this was a negotiation, and now i’m over here contemplating the existential crisis of an almond.
so i decided to stop eating sugar for a week, like a real health guru, but then i immediately started second-guessing whether chocolate-covered almonds count as a “healthy snack” because clearly my brain thought this was a negotiation, and now i’m over here contemplating the existential crisis of an almond.
i just sat on my couch pretending to watch my kid but really just thinking about how the number of times i reset my coffee machine is probably more than i could count, like if that means something about me.