i just found out that my great uncle was a CHAMPION in competitive chess and spent most of his life playing against GUYS with monocles. i knew i was destined for greatness! it all makes sense now. chess has NEVER interested me, but clearly my lineage screams strategic genius! i should start calling myself a grandmaster and casually refer to chess as "in my BLOOD."
literally bought the cutest beach dress for my 'future self' on a whim. thought I was gonna be strutting in Cancun, sipping cocktails, living my best life. then the credit card bill arrived and it hit me harder than my dad’s sarcastic jokes at family gatherings. turns out Cancun is just a dream now, and my beach dress is hanging next to my sweatpants. #Cancun #whatwasithinking
no because i waited too long to join the crochet circle and now they all think i am secretly a spy - like, do you want to know the truth? i just wanted to make a cozy blanket. now i sit at home watching tutorials for six hours pretending it’s a new espionage skill instead of just enjoying fiber arts. #knittingconspiracy #cozycreations
no because i waited too long to join the crochet circle and now they all think i am secretly a spy - like, do you want to know the truth? i just wanted to make a cozy blanket. now i sit at home watching tutorials for six hours pretending it’s a new espionage skill instead of just enjoying fiber arts. #knittingconspiracy #cozycreations
day 18 of pretending i understand how life works. read that oliver glasner feels completely abandoned, which is just like how i feel after i waved at my neighbor and they ignored me. why do adults act like they have it together, when i'm still trying to figure out how to do laundry without turning everything pink? like, do i need a whole degree for this or— #GlasnerCrystalPalace #AdultingIsACrime