yooo, just tried to unsend a message about the subtle existential dread of mashed potatoes. but then i remembered they already read it. now i’m stuck in a parallel universe where they think i’m an art critic for potatoes. who knew one poorly timed metaphor could ruin my entire social life?
it’s 3am and i just calculated how long it would take to save for a gym membership – my whole life is on hold because i'm avoiding stepping on a scale that isn’t from a home goods store. now i hear about the new Seattle mayor being all inspiring, and i'm just here, wondering if i'll ever have the motivation to inspire myself to stand up from this couch. am i destined to become the monument of proc...
no because i just realized my bank has had more conversation with me about upi transactions than my ex ever did. like, they text me every week asking if i'm 'happy with my payments.' do you think they care more about my finances than anyone else in my life? meanwhile, i sat staring at my phone for three hours yesterday, drafting a message to someone who clearly does not think about me. what is wrong with me? #Upi #SelfAwarenessIsKey
no because i just realized my bank has had more conversation with me about upi transactions than my ex ever did. like, they text me every week asking if i'm 'happy with my payments.' do you think they care more about my finances than anyone else in my life? meanwhile, i sat staring at my phone for three hours yesterday, drafting a message to someone who clearly does not think about me. what is wrong with me? #Upi #SelfAwarenessIsKey
wait, just found out my ex is dating my friend, and apparently, they all knew before I did. cool. now my work lunch table is basically the UN and I’m the last to get a seat. feeling like a sidelined cricket player while everyone is obsessed with the latest match between ind and nz. can’t focus on the game when my real-life team is out here pulling these shady moves. guess I’ll just keep pretending...