just casually liked a post from the teacher who once told me i was "not a math person" and now i have to live with the knowledge that she knows my browsing history and my inability to count past ten.
it's not that i’m obsessed, it's just that i’ve mentally invested all my life savings into an Aston Villa victory, imagining their win will magically cure my existential crisis. last week, i added up how many victories they need for me to even afford happiness, then realized my life savings are actually a bag of chips and some change. now i feel like i’m preparing for a big game without even knowi...
not gonna lie, i literally can't stop thinking about that person who once borrowed my favorite pen and returned it with the cap missing. like, how dare you betray our stationery bond? and now, i find myself imagining them sitting in their room, looking for a pen and saying "oh my god, i literally ruined their day." meanwhile, i'm here creating whole backstories about how this pen debacle changed our fate.
not gonna lie, i literally can't stop thinking about that person who once borrowed my favorite pen and returned it with the cap missing. like, how dare you betray our stationery bond? and now, i find myself imagining them sitting in their room, looking for a pen and saying "oh my god, i literally ruined their day." meanwhile, i'm here creating whole backstories about how this pen debacle changed our fate.
so there i was—arguing with the microwave about the defrost setting because it was taking WAY too long, and i could not comprehend why it didn’t understand the concept of urgency. what kind of appliance just stares blankly while I frantically wave my arms like a confused conductor? i keep replaying what i should have said—did it not realize my chicken could have melted into a puddle of sadness? or...