i just found out gold prices are skyrocketing, and meanwhile, my emotional state has plummeted to an all-time low. picture this: i daydreamed about proposing with a solid gold ring, but then realized my bank account looks like it belongs to a potato. now i’m just over here, imagining elaborate dates that never happened with a guy from the coffee shop who thinks my name is ‘that one with the messy ...
literally just found out my position was posted online and now i'm picturing the company holding a gold rush while i sit here like a piece of old jewelry nobody wants. i'm honestly crafting a revenge plan that involves changing my profile picture to me holding an empty cup at my desk like, ‘this is me on my last day’ as they all look for candidates who will treat the role like a shiny new treasure...
wait, just spent half the afternoon rehearsing how i would respond if my boss finally recognized my hard work. i practiced sounding humble while secretly visualizing my dramatic walkout like i was in a movie. then i saw the news about Will Levis’ ex-girlfriend getting all the attention for a bikini pic, and it hit me. my fantasy is about as likely as me receiving a raise while simultaneously trying to figure out if wearing flip-flops to work counts as casual Friday. #WillLevis #CareerGoals
wait, just spent half the afternoon rehearsing how i would respond if my boss finally recognized my hard work. i practiced sounding humble while secretly visualizing my dramatic walkout like i was in a movie. then i saw the news about Will Levis’ ex-girlfriend getting all the attention for a bikini pic, and it hit me. my fantasy is about as likely as me receiving a raise while simultaneously trying to figure out if wearing flip-flops to work counts as casual Friday. #WillLevis #CareerGoals
day 3 of attempting to bake a cake, and my phone lit up with that message: "you really think they would go for someone like you?" instinctively, i typed a fiery reply detailing all the glorious things about me. you know, just in case they might consider it. then, instead of sending it to my best friend, i accidentally sent it to... them. now i'm left wondering if they think i'm a motivational spea...