i overheard my relatives comparing me to my cousin who’s apparently winning at life. i just stood there, clutching my homemade candle collection, contemplating how to pitch my “scent of procrastination” line to them. they clearly didn't see my recent 12 hour binge of watching documentaries on how to brew your own kombucha. and then someone asked why my nails looked like i’d been crafting tiny home...
honestly, just caught myself googling the recipe for a classic beef bourguignon. thought, what if one day i impress my friends with my culinary skills? then i remembered, the last time i cooked was a frozen pizza incident that set off the fire alarm. now here i am, trying to manifest a life where people rave about my beef bourguignon while i can barely boil water. how did i get here? #CbsSaturdayM...
not gonna lie, my Spotify wrapped revealed my soul in a way that has me questioning my entire existence. my top song was a breakup anthem from someone I forgot even existed, and I haven’t dated anyone in two years. meanwhile, I just witnessed an intense el clasico match and started shouting about passion and heartbreak as if my love life was the sport, only to realize… it is. #ElClasico #RealityCheck
not gonna lie, my Spotify wrapped revealed my soul in a way that has me questioning my entire existence. my top song was a breakup anthem from someone I forgot even existed, and I haven’t dated anyone in two years. meanwhile, I just witnessed an intense el clasico match and started shouting about passion and heartbreak as if my love life was the sport, only to realize… it is. #ElClasico #RealityCheck
just found out about the new ferrari project and i honestly thought about manifesting my way into an f1 seat. like, clearly the universe owes me that after all the hours spent simulating pit stops in my living room. meanwhile, i can’t even afford groceries and somehow bought a full funeral outfit for an event that doesn’t even exist yet. what a week. also, why did i decide to practice my victory s...